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3 Steps to Keeping your Cool in a Crazy World

9Feb2008 Filed under: Relaxation, Stress Author: graham
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I recently came across an interesting guest post over at Zen Habits.

Murder! Ringing phones, broken equipment, lost data, rude customers, unreasonable deadlines, demanding bosses. A sure-fire recipe for a 187.

The author, Albert Foong, goes on to note that the days we are living in require emotional intelligence and psychologically tested methods ‘to handle anything that happens in a mature and powerful manner.’ The vital first step, predictably – but helpful nonetheless, is taking radical responsibility for our own behaviour. He then goes on to describe the ABC Model:

Albert Ellis, one of the pioneers of Cognitive Psychology, came up with a simple system to describe how we really operate. He called it the ABC model: Antecedent, Belief, and Consequence.

We believe that A leads directly to C. In the example above, Madison antagonised me, leading to my Anger. But that was not true – there was some reaction in between, my beliefs had filtered the experience and therefore created the anger.

The thoughts I had, revealed the beliefs that lay underneath them: We shouldn’t be shouted at; everyone should be polite; she should respect my skills.


The article goes on further to discuss a favourite topic of mine: breathing.

…by cutting out one part of the cycle, we take momentum away until it runs itself out. Psychologists recommend the Stop-Breathe-Leave method.

…Breathing-in consciously is also a powerful meditation technique. Your mind cannot focus on more than one thing at a time, and by focusing your attention on your breath, you turn off all the distorted thoughts. Without the thoughts, the emotions soon die out. Think of a fire – even once it is dead, the coals will remain hot for a while more.Feel the breath. Feel it coming into your nose, down your airways, into your lungs, into your belly, and out again. Don’t force it, just let it come naturally. Pay attention to it for a few minutes.

I’d recommend reading the rest, even if just to see what Ellis’ added “D” stands for. You might not agree with everything written that the article discusses, but I’m pretty sure that most people would much within it that is practically helpful. And if Think Happy! is about anything, it is about practical steps to mental health that can be easily implemented to making an actual practical difference to our day-to-day lives. (Hmmm… I really need to come up with a catchier way of putting that!)

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